Truths for Mature Humans

1. I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history and phone data if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you are wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times when I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is a great need for a sarcasm font.

5. Bad decisions make good stories.

6. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment in the day when you realize that you just aren’t going to do anything productive the rest of the day. (2pm)

7. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

8. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

9. Shirts get dirty, undergarments get dirty but pants, pants never get dirty and can be worn over and over.

10. Sometimes I look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still don’t know the time.

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